Release. Strength. Hope.

Three values that people seem to struggle with. Three that I have no problems with. Others in my life however seem to have difficulty with them. I understand that, I do...as I've come to terms with what I am, and how different I am from people.

I flew last night. It was wonderful tickling the clouds with my fingertips. I was scared when it became complete darkness, but I reassured myself that if I kept flying straight, I'd run into the sun. Everything seems much smaller and simplistic from up here, and I'm unsure of how things became so big when I was on the ground. I did find however, the more I "pushed" my body to go faster, the harder it was for me to focus, and I became reckless with my balance. I'll have to work on that.

My dreams are the gateway to clarity. Don't be fooled, I'm quite happy with the clearness of my windshield now. I know what's on the other side of the glass, and I am eager to touch the cool air on the otherside. Can you feel the stale air that is in here with me? Or is it me dreaming....I wonder. Wonder. Dreams...feels foolish to speak of these things publicly. I'll have to work on that.

Yellow pads admuse me. Red ink writings on yellow pads admuse me more. They lied to us. The content isn't more important than the pen and tablet. See for yourself. It works. It really does. Hopefully, one day when the ink runs out, they'll be another tip for me to continue the story. I guess I'll have to work on that.

I leave this now. I have to work. Work is frivalous. Embrace insanity to deny stupid claims.

I'll have to work on that.

yellow highlighter

life is not that hard.

i keep telling myself that quote, and it doesn't get easier to understand.

i have a lot of people that come to me with their problems. whether or not i help them, that's to be agreed upon by them. i have no control what direction others take in their life based on some assitance that i offered. but...

after going through their view on their issues, i view whatever problems that are occuring as small. that word...small. small problems that just occur due to life being life. i understand, to me...these things will be this way. i try not to worry about small details and uncomfortable issues that won't have an influence on me a week from now.

i understand some have loved ones they can't get to understand their lives.

i understand you have problems trusting a friend when they've hurt you before.

i get that you're hurting on cash and are having problems paying the bills.

but...if it makes it any easier...everyone has these problems. we're supposed to. life isn't supposed to be easy. if it was, we wouldn't have: sympathy, compassion, regret, and most importantly...love.

yeah...love. love...isn't possible unless you have some sort of chaos causing it.

we stay together due to our flaws, not our simliarities. if we continued our life due to what we have in common, they we never get to experience anything new. we love each other for what we DON'T have in common.

so...we all have the same problems. and talking to others may help dealing with whatever your life is in turmoil about. however...when we embrace the fact that life will always be life, and these problems will always be there...then you stop worrying all the time about things.


that's my spin. that's my take. you can dissagree all you like. but it's worked for me for a while now.